CofiBean Meat Maldito

Tangena pare, dude, bro, sis, ka-orgy, seb and kadugo, I was walking one day sa Ayala Mall when I saw this man! Commoner lang naman him! Uminit talaga my aura just looking at him. Imagine that fag? Adams apple palang I know he’s so uber smelly like the feet sa Burlington socks na indi nawash for one week! Putah pare! He’s sooo kadiri like syphilis na tumubo on his forehead! The fuck man!

So I make iwas to him while walking, pero shet pare, dude, ka orgy ,ka seb and kadugo, kakusa and the like, but lapit parin siya ng lapit sa friends ko. You know we call ourselves dolce and gabana gang para in naman sa masa, and this guy makes lapit to us. Baho palang mga pare, I know it was bamibini baby cologne! And take note mga pare, dude, ka orgy ,ka seb and kadugo, kakusa and the like, he is using pomada on his hair! So tawa ng tawa kami ng friends ko while making liit his ego, he is nearing to cry na pero kami making his ego liit pa. As in sobrang liit na mga pare and dude his ego like dot in an atom, then my friend make pagsigawan ba naman to call him “dudong wipe my ass!”. So katunog ng dudong scarface di ba? It soo pang orcs pare! I like making dura on his pagkalalaki pare, yeah dude! Hithit pa pare! Ahhh!

So he introduces himself to us while we make pili sa susuutin naming para sa pool party sa shangrila. His name is Cofibean daw, and he is acting as if hes so mayaman! Like duh pare! His name is so mabantot like parang the same sa kabayong dead! He wanna shake hands with me, but pero indi ako pumayag kasi naman pare, callos is all over his hands. Mas gugustuhin ko pang I hold ang penis ko keysa sa hands niya no! SO there we are, hes gonna go din daw sa shangrila. Ive done choosing ng susuutin ko, and I chose the black speedo na may diamond sa gitna para naman super sisid ang girls sa diamond ko sa pool while I make tsunami waves. I was so shocked when I saw Cofibean paying his pinili, tapos pare what the fuck! He purchased a cheap tela na branded So-en from China! Recalled daw yun and we so uber tawa to death mga dude sa kanya! COfibean is sooo cheap! So-en? Duh? Gusto niyo siguro his penis will say hello to us while we are in the pool wearing that So-en thingy? Yucky mga pare!

Feeling close ang pohtah mga pare dude! Dikit ng dikit sa aming mga rich in aroma. Once nga dinuraan ko siya ng babolgam ko, as if indi ko siya nakita standing there. So kadiri talaga mga pare when he pick up my babolgam and ate it! Kacheapan mga pare! He is acting like he is mayaman pero skin palang eh alam mo na may ibola virus na! So ayun mga pare, I am so angry already with that stupid hanging around my friends, so I texted my tito who happened to be an assassin.

“Tito, wer na u?her na me?!” I told him using my uber haba antenna nokia 5110.

“Her na me. Wer na u?” Tito replied to me after 5 seconds. Pootah, so coñio this tito of mine na din. So I called tito up cos I want him Now na! (magpakabit na!).

So tito and I talked while that mabahong Cofibean is around. Naman! Big langaw is everywhere! Nakikinig sa conversation namin ni tito.

“ Tito, I want you to kill somebody. He is so salot sa lipunan tito and he make lait to poor people. Barilin mo siya tito, malapit sa mouth please. His name is Cofibean tito, and we are here at ayala. Bye tito. Labyah”. I told tito while I make pindot that End call button.

Pootah mga pare and dude, mga ka orgy and the like, paglingon ko cofibean is wala na. But why? Wala naman akong sinabing masama. Pak dat pare!uber! Arggghh!!

Note: Sa indi nakakilala kay Cofibean, search niyo sa google. Yokong magbigay ng link dito for him. Like duh? Mas mayaman kaya ako keysa sa kanya.